Too sexy for your love.

There’s this myth that is been going around for a long time which I will proceed today to dispel.

- Indian men are not sexy.

I have no idea about the origin of this myth but I am sure it’s been around a long time. It was already prevalent during the colonial times and the trip Gandhi made to London in his loin clothes didn’t help the image much either.

Now, that’s not to say Gandhi wasn’t sexy. He was. No man who isn’t sexy can have the confidence to meet the English Prime minister in his underwear. That man was sexy and he knew it.

Thing is, if you actually think about it you will realize how stupid one has to be to believe this biased allegation on my Indian brethrens.

We all know that Indian women are known as the most beautiful in the world. They have won beauty contests, acted in movies and are lusted by men/ women of all races. (My blog is whichever-way-you-swing supportive).

Further proof can be derived by the sheer number of porn sites that will open up if you Google 'desi girls'. I myself have verified this as research for this post.

Now consider this.

Enquire on whom 90% of these Indian women will marry?

Indian men.

Case closed. Bara boom Bara bam.

I know the existence of rumors about the character of an Indian man. I am shocked by the generalization of a whole population due to the flaws of a few. Never the less, let me take the time to make you see it from another perspective.

Rumor 1: Indian men treat their women badly.

This in my opinion adds an edge to the Indian men. We are the Rhett Butlers of the world. Now we all know that women tend to sway more towards men who treat them bad. Don’t ask me why they do it but they do. Ask any of those nice guys who finished last.

Rumor 2: Indian men do not know how to pleasure a woman.

What!? Man, you are talking about the guys how invented sex. We made religions around it. We have even given the world the maximum permutation and combinations possible in doing it. So in the midst of all this wonderful research for the benefit of the humankind, we kind of missed the clitoris and the g-spot. Big deal. The maximum pleasure for a woman is in pleasuring a man. It is written.

Rumor 3: Indian men are all mamas’ boys.

I fail to see the problem with this. The last I heard there’s no way papa can give birth.

Rumor 4: Indian men are horny.

Of course they are. You try living in a country where your women are declared as the most beautiful in the world.

Rumor 5: Indian men lust after white women.

Actually this is true and the blame falls squarely on the shoulders of the western media. Until an average Indian man reaches adult hood, the only naked women he has seen would have been a white woman. This is thanks to the prevalent western porn industry that caters to our collective Indian lust. Moreover our Indian national pledge has made us feel a little incestuous in having any 'dirty' thoughts on our Indian sisters. So that kind of leaves only white women for our fantasies. This problem, however, is normally cured by marriage to a nice Indian girl from a good family selected by the mother.

I have observed, in my years of study on sex and its relevance in Indian society, that there are basically 3 types of Indian men. They can be termed as:

1. T man.

These are the ones who have been stereotyped by all mallu naughty movies as the master of the house or the son of the master of the house who is always staring down the blouse of Shakeela chechi, playing the maid swapping the floor. They can also be recognized by their inability to have a conversation with a woman without their eyes dropping 6 inches below her eyes.T-men are just grown version of a boy who has not been weaned yet. Fascination towards an anatomical part of the female body whose sole function is to provide nutrition to its young cannot be termed in any other way than being the result of an early weaning.

2. A man.

These species can be found in all Indian Public transport services. In their highly active stage they can be found groping, pinching, touching the derriere of Indian women who are unfortunate enough to catch their attention. In their normal stage, these are Indian men whose attitude towards sex are normal and are focused on procreation. They wear their intention on their zip. Women are advised not to drop anything in front of these guys; worse try picking it up.

3. The T&A man.

A balanced individual. Indian version of a metro man. To this man the only criterion is that the focus of his passion just has to be a woman. Nothing else matters. What can be sexier than that?

For the Indian men reading this, a simple test to determine your type:



If you saw boobs, you are type 1
If you saw a half exposed pair of buns, you, my friend, are a type 2.
If you saw a boob and wondered what her arse will be like is a type 3
If you closed your eyes when you saw the picture, then my son, you are way too young to be googling 'Indian cleavage'.