Sunday, April 3, 2011

Naked Games

I don't understand cricket.

Could never get the unnecessary passion behind 2 guys wacking a ball with a piece of wood and 11 guys running around trying to catch it. It seemed as stupid as that other game where 22 morons run after one ball.

All that changed with the promise made by one Miss Poonam Pandey.

Any game that promises to have a naked woman at the end of it, is a great game in my book. That was all the motivation I needed.

I was cheering myself stupid for India all day yesterday.

My eyes are however yet to be rewarded for the effort.

I like naked women.

I cant really explain why.

Its one of those things that defies logic.

I like women but naked ones are better. Somehow better. Beats me why. Naked men dont hit the right note but naked women are another story all together.

Anyhow. The important lesson here is that it got me watching cricket.

I still dont get it but the anticipation for the rewards of sitting through it is just great.

Its my opinion that there should be a naked woman at the end of every effort.

Women are great motivaters.

Every one might think that it was dedication, patriotism and team work that won the day for India but we men know the truth.

It was Poonam.

Shes our Evita.Our lady of liberty. The shining Icon of everything great about a woman. Her body.

Of course the Indian middle class morality might be offended because according to us, naked women are a myth. They dont exist. Its a western propaganda. Any woman comfortable in her own skin is answerable to the society of fat holy cows who dictates her fate.

Indian woman. Symbol of purity and chasity.

What does nakedness have to do with that? Purity then must be dependent on the layers of clothes that cover it. Hmmm doesnt strike you as correct does it?

If a girl wants to strip, I feel the Indian society should stand back and let her.

After all shes doing it for her country. Others blow themselves up among others for the same reasons. This is a far better option.

Wars could have been ended this way.

What if George Bush said that he will strip himself naked if Osama Bin Laden was'nt found in a weeks time?

History might have been different.

I think this Poonam girl is onto something.

She could be the answer to world hunger.

Mamta Banerjee promises to strip naked if the hungry Indian mass are not fed.

Religious intolerance.

Manmohan Singh threatens full monty if the one thousand religions of India doesnt bury the hatchet and promises to live in peace and let others live in peace.

World peace.

Abdul J Kalam decides to get into the picture by baring it all if the world leaders dont get into one room and come out with a solution.

Poonam could be the new age Gandhi. Her idea could get results for age old problems. Fast.

I say let her do what she wants to do. Lets cheer her on instead of judging her.

From my side, I promise to strip naked in public if India ever loses another world cup.

There! that should solve that problem.

94 comments:

Jon said...

that solves all our problem. So we back in Garden of Eden!

Dawg said...

Good one Tys...unfortunately those of us sharing the college dorm with you have already had the pleasure, and I am now a big fan of world peace, religious tolerance and India winning the world cup!!!

Anything so that I dont have to see you disrobe again...

Jules said...

I just have to say yay for India, I didn't get to see the game, but heard it was great.

Now... I know there was something about naked women in your post, but frankly, you lost me at wacking a ball with a piece of wood... I just kept trying to envision how a man would physically do that... of course I wasn't thinking about cricket at all.

Anonymous said...

naked women are enjoyable except mother sister and daughter.

balaji @ Dominos India said...

When i will order the dominos pizza i got one surprise and great news from other side. last time india vs australia at that time i bought one pizza. india will win first time defeat in anustralia in world cup match semi final. so i bought 3 dominos pizza they will 30 differ run.. oh next time i will bought 10 pizza. india will win by 10 balls remaining what a pretty. Same to follow the IPL 4

Pythoroshan said...

Oh God !! Please .. anything but that last promise... I'm gonna work overtime to bribe the other teams to lose !!!!

Poornima said...

What extent would you go to stop Balaji@DominosIndia & Anonymous from destroying all thats good in Cyberspace? Huh? huh??

:-)

Gunnerz' Forever!!! said...

LMAO:)wah, finally feels like having found a real oasis :)

tys said...

@jon : no way man. Last thing we need is a judgemental voyeuristic omnipresence.

@dawg: iam just surprised u still eat food without gagging at the memory.

@jules : u did it. U made the tuna rice and paid the price. Hot lips , u r way too cool. In regards to wacking a ball with wood, it is an art..much like chasing balls


@balaji : i have no idea what u just said. U ate pizza for india? Iam impressed. Its original. I still think poonam rocks, even though she didnt go thru with it.


@ anon : are they now? I have seen all of them naked, much like some one , someday will see or have already seen and 'enjoy' ur mother's, sister's and daughter's nakedness . Nakedness is just an absence of clothes. Its what is actually existent. It is beautiful in anyone, without ur conditions.

Dr. Roshan : u , my man, cares for humans extent of endurance.

@poori : i can practically see u rubbing ur hand in glee, u wicked woman. But annoying chaps arent they? I liked balaji. How many guys u know who will eat the humble pizza for india? That too dominos. Hes brave


@gunner : oasis? My bro, this is a mirage but stay long and slack ur thirst.

Sankoobaba said...

good idea..
we need such motivation for current Arsenal team..
yeah tell them if they win all remaining games..
some hottie they like will strip for them..
yeah and so inspired Arsenal will again become Invincibles..
yyyyeeeaaahhh ...

Tys on Ice said...

@sanks : isnt it? Iam telling you, this is brilliant. Imagine a stadium full of like minded women who drops their clothes the moment their team wins. Theres no way we will ever lose. Unless of course we are playing Australia and our blue men wants to see some fresh, different perspective.

Rohit Mishra said...

Hey...
WIKILEAKS UPDATE: Poonam wins Big Boss next season.
Reason: Poonam was to strip if she wins...

Siddhartha Joshi said...

Hahahaha...but finally she didn't :( Poor Indians, morality got the better of us...however, I think Ms. Poonam still got a good deal! Lots of popularity and more blog posts in her name than Sonia Gandhi :)

Pundit Commentator said...

:-) I lost interest in cricket ten years ago and no Miss Poonam Pandey didn't change my mind.

pramod said...

struck the right note with a tys hammer.
no one was spared a blow.
keep hammering dude.
thumbs up.

T.C. said...

this is an awesome post. Nice blog :)

Door Hangers said...

Great day today. I had news exact search from you site. I really impress to read that article. I openly I said your site will go in peak. Thanks Bye.

Anonymous said...

@ TYS

Is there a spear ribs shop, where you live TYS, and I don't mean chinese/butchers :) because I seem to get it in it, when ever I am sitting next to MRS. :)

You are right for change, when you said that naked women are great motivators. I too am guilty of this. I don't know why? but I am.

I don't know what it is with people associated with cricket and the game, they don't seem to keep their promises. I too fell for miss pandys promise and ended up becoming cricket fan. :)

HARRY

BTW I will tell you a story next time, if you promise not to laugh at me.

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